#20 The Infirmary

This morning, I woke up and actually got out of bed when I was supposed, too. Fast forwarding through some awkward stuff, it was because I realized I had started my period.

Aren't they just lovely? You bleed for five days straight, while trying not to puke, or writhe in pain too much.

Cramps just suck, don't they? I'm not sure why God decided I should shed the lining of my uterus every month in order to have a baby, but I sure would like to know why. Apparently the official name is dysmenorrhea. This is how Wikipedia describes it:

"Symptoms of dysmenorrhea may become debilitating in some women. It is unknown why this occurs in some women and not others. Severe symptoms may include pain spreading to hips, lower back and thighs, nausea and frequent diarrhea or constipation."

I have all of those symptoms. Each and every one.

And that is why I went to the infirmary this morning.

I was too distracted by my uterus falling out this morning to pay attention to my Algebra retake, so I'm not sure how many points I got back on that. After class ended, I was going to go straight to the cot on first floor, but realized I had no idea where my next study hall was. Walking down the stairs, five freshman appear in front of me like some sort black magic, and they walk so slowly could've kicked them down the stairs at that point and walked over them as I tried to get to ground floor. A few glanced back me, looked startled and looked away. I was literally trying to kill them with my glare. I then realized two things. Killing freshmen would be bad, no matter what the situation. Two, because of my cramps, I was walking slower than them.

By the time I got downstairs, I was begging people for pain killers. In the end, I got them from Olivia Klemme, who from hear on out will be known as The Dealer, for the wonderful drugs she gave me.

"How many of can I take at once?"
"I don't know, I usually take two."
I look at the bottle.
"Are you sure I can't take more?"

Mongo and My Favorite Dinosaur (Dino for short, AKA Michaela) soon found me, and tried to take me up to study hall. I ended up laying down outside of the dance room.

"You can tell her that I crawled into a corner somewhere. I'll be fine right here."

They proceeded to take me to the infirmary, which at the time I was not aware had a name. I signed the infirmary sheet and laid down on the bed. I passed the time singing "Joyful, Joyful" and song X. By the time the painkillers kicked in, study hall was half over.

I went back up to study hall, but now I am putting my foot down for what happens when ever I get my period:

1. Breakfast is not an option. Eat it.
2. Follow it up with 2-3 painkillers. Or five Midols.
3. Do not forget that you cannot ignore cramps. It is a fact that the more you try to ignore them, the faster the reduce you to a pained, angry ball of apathy.

Thus concludes