#2 SWB Meets PWB

Today, Murrbeth ran toward me frantically telling me that I needed to see something.
"Well, let me pack up my things fir-"
"NO, COME WITH ME NOW!" And so I did. Because my school reeks of sweet, sweet (sometimes evil), serendipity, I did see something.

Oh, did I see something.

The Purple Water Bottle. Now let me back up a bit, since you don't know the story.
Once upon a time, there was a little curly haired freshman named S. Dubya B. S Dubya was walking down from Scripture, laughing and joking, with her good friend Mongolian Sweetheart like little curly haired freshmen tend to do. All of a sudden, a menacing force started to emanate from the staircase. S. Dubya could tell because her curls were tingling, the way they always did around pure evil. Now keep in mind folks, Dubya is a completely sane, normal, run of the mill kind of gal, but when she looked down into her hand she-

Well, she went insane.

Temporarily, thank the Lord, but insane she went. Dubya became hysterical! She sobbed and screamed, and worst of all, thoroughly confused Mongo.
"What's wrong?"
"It came out of nowhere- in my hand- stairs- bottle- PURPLE!"

It certainly was quite the ordeal. But Mongo, being the brightest of the bright, managed to make sense of Dubya's garbled sobs. Dubya was walking down the stairs when an evil purple water bottle appeared in her hand because of some sort ancient stairwell curse. As Mongo tried to help Dubya down the hall, people asked what was wrong with Dubya and she always gave them the same response:
"I don't know....."

A few months later, Mongo and Dubya went to the bathroom to get some water (AKA delicious life nectar as I like to call it). Sitting a top the fountain was none other than the hated, the despicable, the vile

PURPLE WATER BOTTLE.

I don't remember much after that, but I assume I gave it a round house kick to the face.

So readers, you may have guessed by now (or read my name), but I was little S. Dubya B. I know, so shocking that calm, cool, collected SWB would react like that to something. But at least now you know what I saw. Returning back to Murrbeth and I, we were standing in the Junior locker room, staring at the purple water bottle crouching like a tiger ready to pounce. As excited as she was, I'm not sure she understood the gravity of the situation. It was RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER LOCKER. I simply said, "You're next," and walked away. I having a feeling my Bottle scare is over and someone else's is starting. Good luck, Murrbeth.





P.S. I know you sent me those used socks, PWB. You wore them one at a time, then put them in a brown paper bag.